Okay, just as I'm getting it through my system that she hates my guts and she'd rather I just die in a hole, my "friend" who terrorizes me and puts me through so much emotional pain tells me she said she might just "change her mind"
-headdeskheaddeskheaddesk- Make it go away.... I just want one straight answer without all the "swore to secrecy" and crap.
I texted her "Do you like me? Nick told me you might 'change your mind' I just want this crap to end. Give me an honest answer, no buts or maybes."
Cuz it's true, I hate this anxiety. It's eating me alive. Although, I know I know the answer, I just don't want to admit it. -sigh- This sucks. I need a real friend that can say "this is all going to smooth over, no need to approach it directly"
But that sort of friend would have to lie.
She texted back "As a friend" and now I am just angry. What kind of friend likes to toy with others personal emotions?
Now I feel embarrassed and stupid. Why am I even in this position?
Why even ask? Why even bother? I give up. No need to keep asking. It's always gonna be, "As a friend" with her, even though I can tell it really means "I wish you'd disappear. I hate everything. |
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